Innocent Spam – Funny Cartoons

I probably get more spam than most people as I have a few different websites, all with their own email addresses. So every time I click Send & Receive I get another 10 spam emails in my junk folder. A full day will see my junk email folder fill with more than 500 spam emails and more than 1000 if the spammers have extra bills to pay. I sometimes get really bothered by them and wish really bad things upon the senders (REALLY bad things), but the only person that my cursing and screaming affects is me. So I just accept spam as being a part of the internet, just like traffic is a part of big cities; you can kick and scream all you want, but it won’t get you out of the traffic jam any quicker.

Anyway, for some strange reason I have been collecting titles from the spam emails. I haven’t decided what to do with them yet, but some of them are quite funny. I even have them in a few different categories, like penis spam, finance spam, weird spam, etc.

Here’s a few from different categories (I didn’t include any of the more offensive ones)..

Subject: beckons trots screwman wheft
Subject: Typewriter Diamond Clock Weapon Circus
Subject: Vulture Drink Child Eyes Fire
Subject: To win or not to win? Choose it now!
Subject: Dear Customer Feel Good Now!
Subject: New software issues strongly recommended
Subject: The most defiant fillies will strive for riding your new big Italian stallion
Subject: Beat her womb with your new big rod, so that she knew who wears the pants!
Subject: There are no losers among the possessors of long dic’ks. Now you can be one of them!
Subject: Make your trouser python huge and rock hard!
Subject: have a king-size phallus Billie
Subject: Dave’s obvious penis
Subject: All sweet flowers succumb to big rod
Subject: If your girl cannot be satisfied with your weewee, you have to turn it into a schlong!
Subject: If you treat your filly as a goddess, why not become a God in her bedroom?
Subject: The most powerful weapon for your s’e_xual battles

The point of this post was to mention someone that is actually doing something with spam, but I got a little sidetracked. Janet Nelson of the Planet named Janet blog is using spam titles to create funny little drawings. Her ongoing series is called “Innocent Spam”

funny spam cartoon

funny spam cartoon
Funny, huh? I like how artists turn ordinary or repulsive things into something funny or beautiful.. Isn’t that called alchemy?

Find more Innocent Spam cartoons on Janet’s blog, or there’s a few posts to her funny spam cartoons here, here and a funny dragon here.

About Dion

Australian artist and observer of things.. all kinds of things. I like a wide variety of art, from the weird and wonderful to the bold and beautiful.. and everything in between.


  1. Thanks for the shout out.

    I think I have seen one or two of the ones you posted. They are so ridiculous sometimes, arent they?

    My son suggested I put them on Tshirts. So that is the next step.

  2. Here’s the best from my spam box today: Want to see the hulk’s howitzer? from Cedrin Constancio. No, thanks, Cedrin. I’ll give it a miss.

  3. Yeah, shirts would be good Janet. Getting them seen on some big geeky/gadget type blogs would probably boost sales too. I would hurry up if I was you though as ideas don’t stay original for very long on the internet!

    Hulk’s howitzer sounds scary

    Here’s a couple from my junk mail folder today..

    Subject: I unleashed my one eyed monster

    Subject: I entered her secret garden

    (they would both make good cartoons Janet)

  4. Thanks for stopping by again. Not that I want to invite more spam, but those you got today made me laugh.

  5. I love Janet’s Innocent Spam drawings and can’t wait for the T-shirts!

  6. I love the drawings.

  7. I think these are hilarious and clever cartoons, and would be great as postcards/posters or as t shirts.

  8. Just yesterday I was at the opening of this spam-inspired little exhibition in Berlin, ‘Life should be full of luxuries”
    Translation of the description:

    Katharina Arndt has copied 12 spam emails and turned them into affectionate embroidery. Sentences such as “Enlarge your penis”, “life should be full of luxuries” or “exquisite replica watches” represent the longings and needs of Western society for size, meaning, youth and status. Embroidery, a medium conscious of tradition, transforms the transience of digital spam into a valuable part of our culture.

    There are certainly dozens of other spam-inspired art projects floating around, some of them pretty good. In fact, there are probably enough for somebody to cook up a glossy coffee-table book on the theme, if they haven’t already

  9. Have you seen Linzie Hunter’s work? She makes interesting typographic illustrations with spam one liners.


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  2. [...] to Old Glutton for sharing the link. I also mentioned Janet Nelson’s Innocent Spam series of cartoons earlier [...]

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